Monday, February 27, 2012

A birthday dream from Jung

What a way to start a birthday - a guest appearance in my dreams with Dr. C. G. Jung himself!  Heady stuff!  And I remembered it!  It was a simple, but an unusual dream, not quite pleasant.  I was at the Burgholzi Clinic in Zurich and Dr. Jung asked us to all bring our "patients" into a room so he could see how we were doing.  At first we were all worried, what would all these unusual people do with each other?  Would there be trouble?  Would they get along?
So I left and got my patient (I never saw myself in the dream, I just know it was me in my own skin walking around and doing things. I never talked.)  I came back with my "patient" who was a large teddy bear sort of man, mute, who carried a large mason jar fulls of lightening bugs.  He moves very slowly - as in a dream within my dream, sort of  "not with it," a lumbering giant.  There wasn't much action after this, even when other people brought in their "patients."  We were all rather mesmerized by the beauty of the light in the jar, but also the bittersweet sadness of them being trapped in a jar.  The man, himself, was sad and poignant, not quite sure what to do.

Well, if this isn't a call from Dr. Jung for me to wake up and get my archetypes ("patients") to get together and have a chat! But it's frightening to think that if all these patients are my archetypes, then are all the individual analysts who treat these patients split off too?  That's why I need Jung to get all these analysts to talk to each other before they can help their "patients!" I see the jar of butterflies  as "illumination/enlightenment" trapped in the jar, beautiful but sad and wrong.  The man - I guess a big lumbering part of me, my "depressed, confused" self  isn't sure what to do - he wants to keep the illumination so it won't go away, but he too is sad they are trapped. 

I am in one of those transitional times, turning 61 today, walking the road to individuation, charting my dreams each morning, taking time to ruminate and figure them out, reading lots of books, by, on, about Jung. It's a time when I feel as if I'm running out of time.  I need more time to work with my clients, to spend with my daughter, son and granddaughters, to teach my oldest granddaughter more about art and writing, to finish two novels and edit three, as well as write a fifth which is already in my head, to draw, to paint, to visit far away friends.
 I've been reading Pilgrim now having finished Powder Dreams (review to come soon I promise) and Jung is a character in Pilgrim, who is treating a mute.  The lightening bugs in the jar came from a movie I took my granddaughter to see on Saturday, Journey to the Center of the Earth 2, where there were lightening bugs in jars.  The large teddy bear man I do not know.  He's not one of the archetypes I recognize.  The patient in Pilgrim is not a large teddy bear like man, although he is tall. My father was not a large teddy bear like man. Since I'm very short, I have never dated very tall teddy bear like men - so this part has me stumped.

Could this be an aspect of my Self?  I know a bit about Jung's techniques but only from reading books. I know I've been a wee bit fractured (well, maybe more than that lately)  Jacob - my animus, a Hermes, trickster, a witty instigator and courageous change-monger type figure, who has been popping up in everyday life when I least expect it, saying things I'm not smart or courageous enough to say, sometimes shocking people, sometimes causing trouble.  And then my editor archetype, bossy, controlling but really wanting the best for people - only from her perspective has been flashing her persona as well.  But Ishtar prevails in the evenings or early mornings, when I'm alone, reading, thinking, going into the depths, writing my dreams down and using active imagination when I'm awake, which sometimes even appears when I'm not looking for it. (which is one of the best gifts while I'm writing a novel, but I'm only writing in spurts now, mostly just thinking).
 I wish there was a Jungian analyst in Greenville, because I'd be there in a heartbeat. But the nearest one is in Asheville, NC and I've researched them and may try and start with one.  But it would be so much easier in Greenville?  Why can't this city be as progressive as Asheville.  More than 100 people showed up for George Frein's talk on Jung's Red Book at our museum!  So now I throw a tantrum like a spoiled child.  I am however also looking into a dream group and hope to start when they begin their next session.

So my plan is to keep thinking about this dream, do research on lightening bugs and their metaphors and symbolic meanings (I learned from Pilgrim that the goddess, Psyche is symbolized by butterflies) and hope that a future dream will help me talk to the silent man and see if he thinks the lightening bugs might be even more beautiful flying free around all of us in the room. I may even have to draw this one to make it even more graphic in my mind - get the two hemispheres of my brain to figure this all out.

Maybe, Dr. Professor Jung will grace me with his appearance once again!
  p.s. Anyone who knows me, knows I am addicted to pomegranate seeds  (recovering Persephone)  and yesterday (before this dream) my granddaughter and I had an adventure at Trader Joe's. And guess what she found for both of us? Dark chocolate covered pomegranate seeds! Is this git or temptation from the synchronisitic universe?

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